Golf....I like golf very much. I think the reason I like it so much is the uncertainty. I have experienced the phenomena of doing well (for my subpar ability), and then the very next round throwing whatever game I had to begin with to proverbial heck. At the very pinnacle of self-confidence I get knocked way back to it is where I came from in the first place. The prompt for this entry comes from today's golf outing. Four of us were in the group, out of which I came in third place. One of the main reasons for this is that I could not drive the ball if my life depended on it. If hitting the ball poorly were a crime, I would be locked away for a very long time. Watching me try to hit the ball was like watching a blind man chop wood. The day wasn't all bad though. At least I made it through the entire nine holes without losing a ball. That rarely happens. I did manage in all my eccentric stupidity to not put sunblock on, and hence my skin magically turned red. (I think they call that a sunburn.) That leaves me with two memories of today's activities. May many happy days of golfing uncertainty be ahead!

A country weekend

In starting this entry, I want to state that yes I am in fact going to a country concert this weekend. Those who know me would most likely be thinking to themselves that I have gone way off the deep end or so, and believe me when I say that I completely agree with you! I will admit that I do like some country, but to consider myself a country fan I have to decline. I often said to myself that I would never go to a country concert, and I find myself disobedient to my own way of thinking. Feel fee to verbally abuse me at any time. The only two reasons I am going are 1. the ticket is free (there is no way I would actually pay to see a country concert) and 2. to get away from Salt Lake for a very brief amount of time. If I don't make it out alive, keep in mind that I went out without much of a fight but with my boots on. So remember to keep me in your prayers as I brave a couple of hours of country music. If somehow I make it though, I will hopefully be a better man for it.

.A Movie for a Life

I think it would be fun to think of various movies that would describe different aspects of my life, and I will attempt to humor you with some ideas that I can apply too my life. First of all, just as a warning I apparently have temporarily lost the ability to be clever, so if this entry sucks, here is my preemptive apology. A movie that would describe my work life well would be The Neverending Story. Trying to describe my everyday life is a little more trying. *thinking really hard* Possibly Groundhog Day. Sometimes I feel I am reliving the same day over and over again. On to my social life. A good one for that would be The Invisible Man, which would aptly describe why it is Friday, and I am home. Finally on to my love life. As a precursor to this let me say that I am overly ecstatic that Valentine's Day will be here before we know it. YAY VALENTINE'S DAY!!*
The two movies that instantly come to mind are 1. Gone With the Wind and 2. Gone in 60 Seconds. I don't think I need to explain those. This probably isn't my best work, but it will have to do. I hope you at least somewhat laughed or at least started to crack a smile.
*=sarcastic remark

Holey Pantalones!

Last weekend I was in the mall looking to purchase some clothing. I was looking at pants, and noticed that mostly every pair of pants had at least one hole in them. I was unaware they had thrift stores in the mall these days. The sad observation was the store I was in was not in fact a thrift store, only had the quasi-appearance of one. One of the many things I will never do is buy a pair of pants (new) with holes already in them. If I did, in some hopefully brief instance of insanity and confusion wish to purchase holey pants, I would just go to the DI and save myself about fifty dollars. In fact, I don't think even the DI would sell such pants. Luckily I was eventually able to find a nice pair of pants with no holes. Call me old fashioned or whatever you will, but if any pants of mine have holes, it will be because I wore them out, or out of my own stupidity caused the hole myself. Don't get me started on the pants with the stains already in them.

Overconfident to zero in 30 minutes

Confidence is a very good thing. Overconfidence is not so good. In my opinion, males are born with a gene that makes us believe in ourselves more than we should. It is similar in some respects to the idiot gene, and the "I don't need to ask for directions" gene. Well one night, that gene decided to show up in all its glory. Getting straight to the point, I felt like I could handle the "chocolate milk challenge". This consists of drinking a gallon of chocolate milk in an hour, and then keeping it down for another hour. To make a short story even shorter, I failed. It wasn't one of those times where I can say that "I almost made it" , I didn't even come close. I lasted about thrity minutes. The remains of my ill-fated attempt were scattered across the bathroom floor. Do you know how it feels to stand in the ruins of a crumbled ego? Not good I will tell you, but a man's ego is like a cartoon character. It can get blown up one second, then appear in the next scene as if nothing had happened. This occured back in 1999, and I am happy to say that my overconfidence gene is still as good as ever.

What day was my date again?

What I am writing I consider to be one of my most embarrassing moments ever. This occurred back in February I believe. One of the few times in my life I have had a second date happened to be that night, or "a" night really. Maybe I was just so in shock that I got a second date that my mind was not in the right place. Anyway, as the story goes, I get myself ready, and well that really goes without saying as I prefer to look as presentable as I can when I go on a date. I show up at this girl's door, and after a bit she finally opens the door. All was not well. I noticed that she was not dressed for going on a date, rather the attire she was wearing was definitely more suited for sleeping. "Why are you wearing pajamas?" I said to myself. "What are you doing here?" she said to me audibly. Naturally I responded that I was here for the date, as I had assumed we would be going out that night. Well she then proceeded to tell me that the date was not until the following night. At that moment, every single idiot alarm in my body went off, my face probably turned red. She graciously readied herself and we went out anyway. End of story: we went on one more date after that, then an abrupt end. And I wonder why I am still single.

The Game (A sports allegory)

Way back when I was 16, I was drafted into the NDL (National Dating League). I was a rookie, in fact I didn't even play at all my first year. My second year wasn't much better as far as playing time goes. Most players in the NDL play a few years, get their bumps and bruises, and eventually retire at a reasonable age. A select few choose to retire long before their time, and yet others choose to play way past their prime. After several year of playing the game, after my share of broken legs and concussions, after becoming a seasoned veteran, I find myself somehow still playing, and although I am past retirement age, I cannot retire. I am running out of breath from being on the field so long. I really need to call a timeout to catch my breath.