Holey Pantalones!

Last weekend I was in the mall looking to purchase some clothing. I was looking at pants, and noticed that mostly every pair of pants had at least one hole in them. I was unaware they had thrift stores in the mall these days. The sad observation was the store I was in was not in fact a thrift store, only had the quasi-appearance of one. One of the many things I will never do is buy a pair of pants (new) with holes already in them. If I did, in some hopefully brief instance of insanity and confusion wish to purchase holey pants, I would just go to the DI and save myself about fifty dollars. In fact, I don't think even the DI would sell such pants. Luckily I was eventually able to find a nice pair of pants with no holes. Call me old fashioned or whatever you will, but if any pants of mine have holes, it will be because I wore them out, or out of my own stupidity caused the hole myself. Don't get me started on the pants with the stains already in them.

Overconfident to zero in 30 minutes

Confidence is a very good thing. Overconfidence is not so good. In my opinion, males are born with a gene that makes us believe in ourselves more than we should. It is similar in some respects to the idiot gene, and the "I don't need to ask for directions" gene. Well one night, that gene decided to show up in all its glory. Getting straight to the point, I felt like I could handle the "chocolate milk challenge". This consists of drinking a gallon of chocolate milk in an hour, and then keeping it down for another hour. To make a short story even shorter, I failed. It wasn't one of those times where I can say that "I almost made it" , I didn't even come close. I lasted about thrity minutes. The remains of my ill-fated attempt were scattered across the bathroom floor. Do you know how it feels to stand in the ruins of a crumbled ego? Not good I will tell you, but a man's ego is like a cartoon character. It can get blown up one second, then appear in the next scene as if nothing had happened. This occured back in 1999, and I am happy to say that my overconfidence gene is still as good as ever.